Why does everything cost a pretty penny? Why can’t it cost an ugly penny instead? I have no shortage of those. There’s also a certain comicality to the fact that Abraham Lincoln, one of our most uncomely presidents, has his visage minted on the coin. Let’s face it, while he was a great man, he wasn’t the greatest-looking one. Once, when accused of being two-faced, Abraham Lincoln humorously retorted, “If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?” Given his appearance, we should be thankful that a coin only has one head. He looked poorly, and maybe that’s why a penny is only worth one cent, and anybody with only pennies to their name is bound to also be poor. Another example of an ugly penny is that clown from IT, Pennywise. Even with all that makeup on, IT was still hideous.
All I know is whether it’s a pretty penny or an ugly one, I don’t want to resort to having a penny wedding. I also do not want to be so broke and penniless that I only have enough to pay someone to play the “Wedding March” on just a penny whistle. It would be just my luck that someone would also be Pennywise. Also, I’d like to buy my wife a house someday, maybe somewhere on “Penny Lane,” which “is in my ears and in my eyes,” just not in my pockets. I should have thrown more pennies into an actual wishing well instead of the sewer drain outside my house where Pennywise might live. If only people gave me a penny for my thoughts, I might have more than just my two cents.
