Times are tough these days—even Santa’s had to tighten his belt. And if you know him, you’ll realize that’s no easy feat. Squeezing down chimneys is probably less of a challenge. But credit where it’s due: Santa’s trying to shed a few pounds by taking lessons at Deck the Dance Halls, where they’re offering a Latin dance course. Believe it or not, he’s getting pretty good—you might even call him Samba Claus. After all, why should sugarplum fairies have all the moves?
With the economy being what it is, Santa’s also taken on a side hustle to keep Christmas afloat. This year, he’s opened his own donut shop: Kringle Kreme. You might be wondering, “Why not cookies? Everyone loves Christmas cookies.” Well, Santa loves them too—a little too much. And what’s the point of all those pricey dance lessons if he’s just going to undo the progress?
If you stop by Kringle Kreme, you’ll find his signature pastry, the kringle, alongside a variety of festive breakfast treats. My personal favorite? A powdered sugar donut stuffed with “jolly filling.” Another crowd-pleaser is the Bear Clause. And you can’t go wrong with the classic vanilla icing donut topped with “Sprinkles”—not the confection, mind you, but an elf who takes his job very seriously. Not in the mood for donuts? There’s always the peppermint fritter, perfect for those on Santa’s “Nice” list.
For the kids, Santa’s got a Merry Meal complete with a toy handcrafted in his workshop. If you’re in a hurry, Rudolph’s got the drive-thru covered, or you can opt for delivery through DoorDasher. And here’s the real kicker: for a limited time, buy a dozen donuts and get a free visit with Santa himself. (Offer valid for one good boy or girl and redeemable only at the North Pole location.)
At Kringle Kreme, it’s always “Dough! Dough! Dough!” So Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good nut!
