Sometimes, I swear I might be having a senior moment, and that is preposterous because I’m only going on 40, which my girlfriend so thoughtfully likes to point out. Once, literally I had convinced myself that I was a year younger than I am until she reminded me otherwise. That is a prime example of having a senior moment. Speaking of prime, I feel I’m long past being in that.
Not by any means would I consider myself a senior citizen; however, I certainly know that I am over the hill, but that doesn’t really amount to a hill of beans. Unfortunately, you don’t get a senior discount for simply having a senior moment or being over the hill. It’s a shame because saving at least 50 cents on a hamburger would be nice. Do you know what would go good with a hamburger? The aforementioned hill of beans, that’s what.
I’m sure, at this point, you wish those beans were coffee beans to keep you awake while reading this nonsense. I can completely relate. I feel like taking a nap while writing it. The more I get up in years, the harder it is to get up in the morning, let alone get through the day without one. And by nap, I don’t mean a dirt nap. I’m not that old! What was I even talking about again? Oh, yeah, senior moments. I must be having one now. But yeah, I’m not that old. I merely have a senior moment from time to time.
My feeling is that if you’re still below the age of wearing Bengay and hearing aids, it should be called something else. I like the sound of junior moment, which I can still hear, thankfully, without hearing aids. It also sounds very similar to a delicious brand of candy. So, when you announce to people you are having a junior moment, especially when they have hearing aids, they instead might think you’re saying, “I’m having a Junior Mint.” Nobody then will see you being anything but in mint condition. Also, a mint comes in handy after eating a hamburger and a whole hill of beans. Heck yeah, I still remember that joke from a few paragraphs ago. I told you I was only having a junior moment.